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Spike Milligan Quotes

Welcome to wonderful and zany world of Spike Milligan Quotes. For those of you unfamiliar with Terence Alan Patrick Seán Milligan, or Spike as he was better known, let me fill you in a little. He was born in India in 1918 to an English mother and an Irish father who served in the British Army.(He took Irish citizenship in 1962). He started a Jazz musician but soon began to write comedy sketches.

Spike Milligan QuotesSpike Milligan

During the World War II Spike served in the Royal Artillery and was wounded in action while serving in Italy. He entertained troops with his love of jazz and comedy. After leaving the army, he was involved in a number of comedy acts and got a big break in 1951 writing scripts and performing with Peter Sellers and Harry Seacombe in what became famous as the 'Goon Show'. The show ran for over 20 years.

Spike was well known for nonsense poems and verse and some poems such as the Jabberwocky are still popular with kids. Spike was a crazy comedy great and a wonderful man who made fun of his Irish background.

Funny Spike Milligan Quotes

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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My father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.
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Well, we can't stand around here doing nothing, people will think we're workmen
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Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
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I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.
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I told you I was ill.
(What he wanted for his epitaph!)
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I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, and the earth brought forth grass and the Rastafarians smoked it.”
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I thought I'd begin by reading a sonnet by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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Listen, someone's screaming in agony - fortunately I speak it fluently.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
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Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy.
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All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
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Also check out our Funny Irish Sayings page


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